Tears and strength

I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m crying. I’m sorry I can’t hold my tears. They just seem to come out of me and I have no control over them. I’m sorry. Do you have any tissues? I’m sorry I’m crying. I know I should be over this by now. I’m sorry. Women tend to…

The things people say…

“What DO you say to someone who has just lost a loved one?” This week I had the pleasure of visiting another book club, which consistently yield excellent conversation. Again questions like this came up in conversation with some of the members as well as laments at what people have said to them in times…

I am grief.

Every week, our yoga instructor encourages us to consider choosing a focus for our practice, suggesting such things as joy and calm. This morning one word came to mind and insisted on staying: grief. It is my honor to hear people’s experiences with grief as I visit groups and organizations to talk about my book,…

Wellness, Death, Blame, and Control

Yesterday I had a wonderful visit with two women I love and respect. We gathered to talk about forming a study group around my book, Phe, but ended up discussing all manner of things. One of them works as a physical therapist, who has done wonders for my own shoulder issues, and shared with us…

Molotov Cocktail

Who were you before this moment? Before the Russians rewrote your whole person? Before this moment you were someone else. Someone other than the ruddy faces woman mixing Molotov cocktails to defend your country. Yesterday you might have mixed vodka tonics for your book club or poured out horilka to toast a friend’s birthday. Your…

Psalm 126: Lament and Hope

Psalm 126A Song of Ascents.When the Lord restored the fortunes of Zion,we were like those who dream.Then our mouth was filled with laughter,and our tongue with shouts of joy;then it was said among the nations,‘The Lord has done great things for them.’The Lord has done great things for us,and we rejoiced.Restore our fortunes, O Lord,like…

Grief and Gratitude

I packed up a student’s belongings yesterday. He was one of our gap year students, meaning he has a high school degree already from his home country and was with us simply for an American experience before heading off to college back home. I pulled his clothes off their hangers, folding them neatly to go…